Anal Mindfulness & Pleasure
"To a large extent, the appearance of the anus reflects something of our past and current experiences, though we may not realize it."
My diploma thesis as a sexological body therapist at the ISSB I wrote about the anus and its influence on our life energy and psyche. I created a guide for a healthy and pleasurable connection with the anus, which I would like to share with the world. Anal diseases and pain during bowel movements as well as anal pleasure are always taboo topics, but the anus & pelvic floor are potential storage and tension zones for emotions and psychological issues. Anal mindfulness in everyday life and especially when defecating, as well as daily anal self-touching, e.g. through a short finger massage in the shower, can prevent anal diseases, free your inner connection and perhaps also open the door to a potential undiscovered source of pleasure and energy. So let's talk louder about the anus and its potential!
I hope that this guide inspires you to be more mindful of your anus in the world and to consciously take time to love your anus. I hope that more people will have a more relaxed, unashamed and joyful relationship with their anus and their excretions.
HOW TO BECOME BUDDY WITH YOUR BUTTHOLE
"From Anal Mindfulness to Wellness to Pleasure "
If you have anal disorders, the focus is first on awareness and relaxation so that the disorders in the anus can heal. The goal here is anal wellness and not anal pleasure. This can be pursued in the next step. If you do not notice any changes or experience severe pain, it is important to consult a specialist at an early stage. Be it for a medical assessment or for body-oriented support through mindful touch and advice.
1 | VIEW
Look at your anus in the mirror, observe it regularly - what changes? Can you see the stress of your everyday life in the face of your anus? Personify your anus - build a "buddy" connection to be in dialog with it.
2 | ANUS BREATHING
Breathe deeply into your anus on a regular basis. Try breathing deeply into and out of your anus in a moment of fear, uncertainty or irritation in everyday life. Observe your anus in your everyday life - how does it react to different everyday situations? Ask yourself: How does my anus feel right now?
3 | SELF-TOUCH
Gently touch your anus and insert/breathe in a finger every day, e.g. in the shower. "Staying in touch" with your finger in your bottom is the most effective preventative measure for the anus, allowing you to detect any new changes at an early stage.
"Nothing can promote long-term awareness and relaxation more effectively than developing the habit of sensitively inserting a finger into your anus for a minute or two every time you shower or bathe."
4 | ANUS-FOOD
Drink plenty of fluids, avoid alcohol and caffeine and regulate your stool with bulking agents such as flaxseed and psyllium husks for a formed stool consistency. The consistency of our stool should be soft but well formed.
5 | CELEBRATE YOUR CHOICE
Take time to excrete consciously and in a relaxed manner - without pressure or pain. Pay attention to your natural impulse to eliminate, follow it and don't suppress it. If nothing comes or happens, don't push, but leave the bathroom again and come back when a body signal appears.
Breathe deeply and exhale loudly, make sound-sum sounds, relax your jaw muscles, yawn and stick out your tongue. Relax your pelvic floor muscles: Imagine how your anal muscles relax and open up. At the end of the bowel movement: consciously contract your sphincter again.
Toilet stool: Create an elevated leg position with a butt stool so that the muscles relax better and the rectum is straighter and less in a kink.
Moisture: Use a Vaseline or cream before excreting. Wet toilet paper is not recommended due to the irritating ingredients it contains. You can moisten the conventional paper with water or use a butt douche: Shower your anus with warm water before and after a bowel movement, this helps to relax and is gentler than rubbing with toilet paper.
Farting: Suppressing the naturally produced gases leads to destructive tension. Enjoy your farts and try not to hold them back.
6 | RELAXATION
Reduce stress in your everyday life with windows of calm for relaxation. (e.g. meditation, yoga, sauna, bath) Schedule time for self-love and your solo sexuality to feel yourself and enjoy your body.
7 | MOVEMENT
Move and bring softness and vitality to your pelvis: Pelvic circles, dancing, etc. Incorporate 15-30 minutes of physical activity per day into your life. In addition: sitting for long periods is pogox: organize a standing table or sitting ball.
8 | ANUS TRAINING
Muscles that are not trained lose their tone and elasticity - which is why pelvic floor training is an important preventative measure for anal health.
Step 1: Discover your pelvic floor muscles
Feel and feel your pelvic floor muscles and observe the interplay of tensing and relaxing in front of a mirror. Imagine your pelvic floor is like a bowl in which your genitals, digestive tract and internal organs are held. This shell can expand downwards like a sail and contract/float up again.
Step 2: Train your pelvic floor muscles
Recognize "dead" everyday moments and fill them with small training sequences: waiting on public transport, at red lights in the car, etc.
Ride the elevator: Imagine your pelvic bowl going up a few floors like an elevator - hold the tension on the 5th floor and then ride up to the -2 and let go.
Pull-in/push-out: inhale water, draw in and then spray out through anus
Pulsations: rapid contraction and relaxation of the anus sphincter muscles
Pelvic swing: Imagine you have a wall wood through your hip bones and place your hands on the handles, rocking your pelvis forwards and backwards, your hands moving with it. Here at lilli.ch there are helpful videos on pelvic swings.
9 | SELF-MASSAGE & EXPLORATION
STEP 1: Exploration Outside
Start with a warm bath or a sensual shower and look at, touch and massage your anus from the outside.
STEP 2: Exploration inside
Breathe in your finger with a gentle pressure - the insertion happens by consciously breathing into the sphincter and the relaxation/opening by breathing out - also with a relaxed sigh and sound. Use plenty of lubricant. The attitude is acceptance and love, no matter how open your anus is to receiving. Nothing has to happen: only go as far as is comfortable and pain-free for you. Pressure to perform is poison for anal relaxation and pleasure.
You can give your anus a massage using circular movements - try out what feels good for you and is good for your anus. Massaging tension and trigger points on the outside and inside of the anus can be beneficial. Enlarged haemorrhoids and anal fissures (if not inflamed or painful) can be touched and massaged. The inner anal area is also the storage of your shadow experiences - your exploration journey may also allow you to feel difficult emotions if you allow it.
Example anal fissure massage: For the first two days, the person inserts their own index finger with plenty of lubricant into the anus and leaves it there for ten minutes. They do this twice a day. On the following five days, the person performs a circular movement. This helps fissures to heal more quickly and recur less frequently. The theory behind this is that the dilation of the sphincter muscle causes the muscle, which is usually too tight, to relax.
STEP 3: Self-pleasuring with the anus
Include the anus in your masturbation practice - notice and touch your anus when your desire increases and discover how it feels. Vibrate with your anal contractions and also feel this connection during an orgasm. This connection can be fascinating, e.g. watching yourself and your anus pulsate in a mirror.
STEP 4: Rectum Exploration
Wearing butt plugs or inserting dildos or dilators will help you explore even deeper areas of your rectum where your finger can't reach. This stretching can help to loosen the muscles even more deeply and promote elasticity.
STEP 5: Sharing Anal Pleasure
Many people go straight into anal sex without taking the time to touch each other's anus without intention and massage with their fingers. Recommendation: Full-body sexuality including anal touching without intercourse - no matter how tempting. This creates security and no pressure to perform - on both sides. This can build trust and open up a playful space to try things out, where needs and feelings can be expressed and breaks can be taken.
"Developing and maintaining the habit of exploring your anus for a few moments each day will help promote a lifetime of anal wellness and pleasure."
10 | ANAL EXPLORATION WITH EXPERTS
Anal and pelvic floor massage with professionals can support a healthy connection to the anus in the case of anal disorders, as a preventative measure, to discover erotic anal potential and for relaxation/stress reduction. The shared space can be particularly supportive for the emotions and issues that can arise when exploring this part of the body.
The following techniques from sexological bodywork can support people:
Anal meditation: Calm method to consciously feel into the anus and perceive emotions. The finger is inhaled/sucked in and then remains inside without movement for approx. 45 minutes.
Anal mapping: Method to create an anus map and build more awareness of the different areas in and around the anus. Touching points in and around the anus with a finger.
Anal exploration: method to feel muscles, where am I more tense or relaxed, where do I feel what, the finger tends to be more mobile compared to mapping - massages areas and explores more actively.
Anal massage: massage of the pelvic floor muscles, anus, prostate.
"What would our society be like if we all received a weekly anal meditation?"
CURIOUS TO KNOW MORE?
You are welcome to contact me for your individual accompaniment with your anus.
